Its funny,you know, when you encounter something when you least expect it. Specially if it is something or someone from the past .And more so if the last parting was not really on amicable terms. How would one, then handle such a situation?Does one simply jump to the last memory and carry forward from there, or erase the past and try to make a fresh beginning? What if you are not really the concerned party here. You were just an observer of two parties, one of whom was close to you. How would you then react to the other person when you meet him/her after a long time?
I encountered such a scene today. And I don’t know what has peeved me more. The memories of what could have been, or my hiding-under-the-sand act.
Okay, to give you the background first.
A long time back, maybe close to 8-9 years back, my brother was in love with his colleague, called H. She was cute as a button,chubby,short and everything that my brother was not (read, model of patience ) . They made a cute pair, he all dark and slim, she , short and cuddly .
Whenever she used to visit us, she would never come empty-handed, always making sure that she brought goodies for me and Bags. Parents were in Kolkata those days. When they came to know about the ‘affair’, they immediately swooped down on Pune and tried to set matters straight. Which means, they discussed at length about the seriousness of the relationship and whether Bro and H were sincerely keen on getting hitched up. Once convinced that they were, dad and mom set up an appointment with H’s parents.
The meeting didn’t go well. Hell, it went horribly for both Bro and H. Dad had no idea that H’s parents were so vehemently against the proposal. They didn’t want anything to do with a muslim family. Dad tried reasoning with them, but the last straw that broke the camel’s back was when H’s mother fell at Dad’s feet and asked him to ‘release’ her daughter.That was it!! Dad was embarrassed and humiliated. He quietly bid them good-bye and walked out. Bro followed him. The parents didn’t say anything much after that. A couple of days later, they left for Kolkata. Obviously, they were also hurting, though they had given it their best shot. Before leaving, Dad just told brother to take a decision wisely and think about the repercussions of his actions.
Bro met up with H and after hours of careful consideration, decided to part ways. She, because she couldn’t get married without her parents approval. And Bro, because he didn’t think it was brave to marry a girl against her parent’s wishes. For months and years after that, Bro was moody, irritable and angry. What he shared with H was precious. She anchored him. And without her , he felt quite lost.
But luckily, by late 2004, he got married to Bhabhi,who more or less made up for all his loss. I can confidently say that now she is his anchor. The keeper of his secrets, well aware of H and Bro’s feelings for her. Bhabhi is now Bro’s best friend and confidant and it pleases the eye to see them both together .
And this morning, after 8 long years, I saw H. She looked just the same, except maybe a little more chubby on the face. She also looked weary and tired. I was in the auto, at a signal, and she was on her bike, right next to me. It was a long wait. I could have easily reached out and said hello.
I didn’t because I wasn’t sure what reaction my presence would bring out. Would she feel happy to see me?? Would she suddenly remember Bro and feel sad? Was she married?? If not, who’s to blame? What if she is? Is she happy?? I cowered behind all those questions and hid my face in my scarf. I couldn’t bring myself to talk to her just then. Because what we had to talk about would take more time than a 2-minute signal.
I also had this deep pang of regret in my heart. It doesn’t help to know that not all love stories have a happy ending. Sometimes, people move on, sometimes they don’t.
But it would be awful to actually lose someone you love, don’t you think so??
All I can say is, I’m mighty grateful to Allah that me and the BF did not suffer this fate.
And I also pray that H is very happily settled. That she has a loving husband who dotes on her, and maybe a couple of kids to bring sunshine in her life. She is a gem of a person and deserves the best in life. Ameen.