Archive for December 16th, 2009

They make me feel wanted……

……..just when I need to feel it the most!!!

I guess most working moms suffer this deeeeeeep in-built guilt mechanism which regularly sends out guilt-alarms.

And the one in me is most active. I have guilt pangs practically every minute!

A recent incident made the guilt machine work overtime. A guest had come visiting a couple of weeks back. It was a Sunday afternoon and I thought I’ll quickly go out to buy the weekly baby-stuff (diapers, formula,etc).

Everyone was sitting in the drawing room, even the twins. I made a quick dash to the door, and was about to exit, when I heard the guest say, ” Wow!! The kids are not running after their mom?!! Thats surprising”!!

I did not wait to hear what reply the in-laws gave him.

I was too busy ruminating on his words. Because they were true. I needn’t have rushed to the door. The twins had seen me, but they weren’t keen on following me. And it made me realize that indeed, there were numerous times when I would come back from office and the twins would give me a cursory glance and then get back to their playing.

It hurt. It hurt real bad.

But the last few days have been different. The minute I step into the house, both of them start wailing for my attention. If I pick up RS, SS starts bawling real loud. And if I pick up SS first, then RS madam howls the roof down.

Currently, they go to sleep only if I take them on my lap. And if they get up in the night, they look around for me and then crawl up to me and snuggle up.

You cant imagine the rush of love and joy that I feel then.

The deep satisfaction of being wanted, of being needed by your loved ones.

I know that once the babies grow older, they may not always look for mamma in their sleep…but this moment now is mine to cherish.

Kids do that, you know…..turn a practical, all-knowing woman into a pool of incoherent mush.

And mine have earned the highest honour in this field 🙂

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…..he re-affirms my belief in him!!

I wanted to post this on Monday itself, but was so caught up with work, that it absolutely skipped my mind!

On monday, the USELESS maid (yes, she has rightfully earned the title now) called up to say she couldn’t come since she was awfully tired after attending the wedding.

(Yeah. Right. I believe that!!)

Anyway, it caused a mini-panic situation at home. MIL had the term-end practicals going on in school and couldn’t take a leave. I’m caught up with a release this week and am pretty booked myself. As it is, the company bus was going to arrive in another 5 minutes and I had a decision to make.

So I took the only possible way out and asked the BF if he could stay back.

And he says, “Sure, no problem. You go ahead. You have a release. Carry on. I’ll stay home”.

Just like that.

And here I was, the dialogues ready on the tip of my tongue….on how he should be taking responsibility in the time of need…blah blah n blah….

But there was no need for begging. Or pleading. Or whatever (which I was ready to do!!).

Sometimes….he just doesn’t give me reason enough to rant.

Sometimes….he makes me realize that I did make the right choice after all.

Sometimes….I think I’m falling in love with him all over again 🙂

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