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Archive for February 11th, 2010

Tell me Why…….

 

……..my blog is visited most by people looking for “Bitter Gourd”.

I did just ONE post on it. One measly post to say that I love that ugly, bitter vegetable.

And for the last 15 days, it is the ONLY search string which leads people to my blog (about 10 hits per day!!).

ūüėź

What?? Is my blog suddenly the Karela Paradise – Gourd’s own Country?? (Kindly ignore the pun. Or my attempt at it.)

Coming to the point.

I’m kinda surprised at the overwhelming search for ‘bitter gourds’ happening right now. Even as I type this, there are people hopping over to catch a few pics of the bitters (‘Bitter gourd pics’ is the SECOND most searched string).

Well, for people who do land up here searching for them,¬†believe me, when I said I loved that vegetable, I meant that I just loved eating it once in a while. I don’t love it enough for me to make this blog a karela destination.

If this continues any longer, I’ll be mad enough to simply purge the aforementioned post from my blog. Ged rid of the root of the problem!!

I’ll miss it though ūüė¶

ETA :- Am posting the snapshot of the search items. Check this out :-

Search for Bitter Gourds

WHY???

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Countdown to V-Day….

……..and we have politician of every make and size spouting their take on it.

I mean,¬†this guy’s ¬†pearls of wisdom are to DIE for!!!

Sample this ,” Nobody can drag us into creating any kind of violence and our members don’t want any trouble.”

Yeah right.

In 2009, they did the MOST peaceful protest EVER.

If they weren’t around to uphold the ‘culture’, our country would have gone to the dogs ages ago!!

Tell me Mr. M, if the women in this country went around in Amrapali outfits and men in dhotis, the number of rape cases would come down surely, won’t they??¬† Of course they will.

After all, aren’t these dresses an epitome of “Indian culture”?? And doesn’t Indian culture guarantee a crime free environment??

Amrapali style

And oh, while at it, would you please send your goons men to demolish the structures of Khajuraho. So offending, aren’t they?? Tributes to love and¬† S**, they say.¬† How disgusting!!

How against our culture!!!!

You would understand, wouldn’t you, Mr.M.

BTW, I wonder, are you married?? If yes, do you love your wife??

If no, then it explains EVERYTHING!!

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I felt like an Idiot…..

……after watching 3 Idiots!!¬†

No, seriously, I mean it. 

Hold on, hold on. Dont start throwing the jootas and chappals yet ūüôā . Hear me out !!¬†

It was a Raju Hirani movie. The one of Munnabhai fame. 

I had high expectations. 

It starred Aamir Khan. My HERO!! 

I had higher expectations. 

It starred Madhavan. (Does anyone remember Ashley from Banegi Apni Baat? I was lost at the first sighting of those bunny teeth!!) 

I was, expectedly, raring to watch this movie. 

And I did. 

Wish I hadn’t. Under all the brouhaha over its being the highest grossing movie of the decade(really!!), I had this urgent need to voice my dissent. And why not?! The movie challenged my intelligence, treated me like an imbecile,¬†whacked ¬†me on the head with its ‘message’, all the while covering it up with sugar-coated preaching.¬†

Impossible to digest. 

I’ve been trying¬†to prepare a list of what actually irked me to no end, and finally, I’ve mustered the courage to put it up here (at the risk of being treated to rotten tomatoes going ‘SPLAT’ on my face!!)

Anyhow.

1) The leads . Check them out. You’ll know what I mean!!¬†

Idiots, ALL of them!!

Balding Sharman.Check. 

Wrinkled Aamir. Check. 

Flabby Madhavan.Check. 

Why couldn’t I have the pleasure of watching a regular 20-year old play the lead role? Why , Mr. Hirani?? You’d rather pay up for Aamir’s¬†steep rates than to invest in finding good newbies for the role? Do we really lack talent that bad?? The bags under Aamir’s eyes can hold small change in them!!¬†

The same applies to Sharman as well as Madhavan. 

The movie starts with freshers joining an Engineering college. And we all know that people apply for engineering after their 12th standard boards. That makes the students 17-18 years old at the time of joining and 21-22 at the time of graduation. 

At no point of time in the movie, could I relate to these three as “Students”!!¬†

2) Boman Irani. WHY??? Aren’t you SICK to DEATH of watching him play the blubbering “Principal” yet again?? Only this time, he gets to wear a curly wig and talk with a lisp. Method acting, anyone?

3) Premise. Raju¬†and Farhan¬†are looking for their friend Rancho for the last 10 years. Why couldn’t they have approached the Principal (with whom they had better relations towards the end) and requested Rancho’s address?? Wouldn’t it be in the student’s personal records?¬† After all, wasn’t Rancho’s father a multi-millionaire?? He would be well known.¬†

What took them so long??

4) The suicides. Aaahhh!! What do we have here?? A Principal confidently telling a student’s father¬† that his ward is not going to graduate. Student commits suicide. No action taken against the Principal.¬†

A student being asked to make a choice between getting rusticated and implicating his friend. Student commits suicide. No, make that, jumps from the Principal’s office, while the Principal is still in there!!¬†

Any action against the Principal?? None. 

I wonder what kind of a**h**** sit on that college’s board!!

5) Doctor doctor!! 

Tell me people, am I wrong in assuming that Kareena¬†Kapoor’s role was that of a SUPER DOCTOR in the guise of a simpering maiden?! So not only is she the fountain of knowledge in Neurology, she’s also the resident gynaec, spouting delivery techniques using a web cam!¬†

The whole of Delhi has only ONE doctor available, and her name is Pia S.  

Save me God!!

6) Suhas. 

Ok, so this guy was called a price-tag. Agreed. Pia dumps him. Understood. 

But what wasn’t clear was that WHY did he wait for 10 years to marry Pia?? Don’t people move on in life?? Couldn’t they have shown Pia getting married to someone else?? Would it have made a difference??¬†

It almost made me pity the poor guy. He seemed more genuine in his affections than Rancho.

7) Ragging. I haven’t understood the director’s fascination for ragging. And in the same manner¬†too !! So we had freshers¬†catwalking in their underwear in Munnabhai¬†and here we have freshers slapping their bottoms in their underwear. Is this the ONLY form of ragging you are aware of, Mr. Hirani?¬†

And oh, did you know ragging is considered as a punishable offence??

8 ) Preach-a-holic. Thats what Aamir has become. The TZP bug had bitten him hard. The venom still flows in his veins. What other excuse could there be, for him to spout gyan at the drop of a hat?!!! 

Student’s funeral, give bhashan to the Principal.¬†

In the classroom, give bhashan to the lecturer. 

At the wedding/mall, give bhashan to the lady-love. 

At drunk get-togethers, give bhashan to friends. 

Its a¬†wonder everyone didn’t conspire to strangle him everytime he opened his mouth.¬†

But behind the bhashan¬†to the characters on screen, was the ‘subtle'(?) gyan¬†being dispered¬†to the public at large. First fifteen minutes into the movie, we come to know of the purpose of the film. Fifteen minutes later, we are told¬†again. Another fifteen minutes pass by and once again, we are made¬†aware. After interspersing¬†the gyan¬†throughout, the message is conveyed once again, just before the end credits roll.¬†

Thunk, thunk, thunk.  

Thats me banging my head against the wall.

You see, Mr. Hirani, I got the message within the first 15 minutes. The worst of the “Duh”s would have got it at 30. But you weren’t convinced .

The Agony of it all ūüė¶ .

9) If I’m not wrong, the college was a co-ed, right? It had girls sprinkled across the campus.¬†

Isn’t it considered indecent to bathe in public when women are around? Why no action was¬†taken against Rancho when he bathes with a water hose?¬†

Oh, I get it. ¬†Its acceptable, because he’s a guy!!!¬† Right.¬†

What if a girl had tried doing that stunt in college? 

Double standards??

10) Mona. Pia’s sister. She gets married, goes into labour. Nowhere in the entire film does she EVER mention her husband. Even at the crucial time of her delivery, no one bothers to inform the father-to-be. In fact, they don’t even¬† call him after the kid is born!!¬†

I mean, C’mon!!! Isn’t¬†the baby’s¬†father the first person a woman thinks about after she delivers?? The first person she craves to give the news to?¬†

The least they could have done was shown Mona grabbing a cell phone to make that all-important call!!! 

Anyhow, I seem to be ranting here, which is not the entire purpose. 

It was a movie, funny at times, but irritating at others. The only person watchable, was Omi Vaidya, as Chatur. 

I wrote about him here before. 

I’m not sure of the postive impact of the film (except for the moolah it has garnered for the people involved with it), but the negatives loom large.¬†

There have been a spate of suicides recently. Or maybe, the media is highlighting these in the wake of the movie. 

Whatever the case, I personally feel that Raju Hirani could have done a much better job. There was so much potential here. 

Alas, it was all lost the minute Aamir gave his, “am-a-cute-youngster-with-stars-in-my-eyes” smile.¬†

There’s a limit to which we can be fooled.¬† Didn’t expect you to do this to us, Mr.Hirani ūüė¶

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