Since its your B’day today and you are busy playing golf , it is only fitting that I give you a golf tribute 😀
Here’s some Golf-fun, only for you 🙂
1) The confession
Out on the golf course with his wife, The husband says, “Twenty years ago I had a brief affair. It meant nothing. I hope you can forgive me.” His wife was hurt but said, “Dearest, those days are long gone. What we have now is far more valuable. I forgive you.” They embraced and kissed.
On the seventeenth tee, the husband was starting his back swing when the wife blurted out, “I’m sorry darling, I’ve been so conscience stricken told me, but since we’re being honest with each other, I have something to tell you also. Fifty-two years ago I had a sex change operation, I was a man before I met you. I hope you can forgive me.”
The husband, froze at the top of his back swing, then threw a fit! He slammed the driver into the ground, kicked the ball into the woods, stormed off the tee, pushed the golf cart over on its side, broke the rest of his clubs one by one, then started on her clubs.
He screamed and ranted, “You liar! You cheat! You despicable deceiver! How could you? I trusted you with all my heart and soul – and all these years you’ve been playing off the LADIES TEES?!?!”
Some things are sacred.
2) The understanding engineer
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.
The engineer fumed, “What’s with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!”
The doctor chimed in, “I don’t know, but I’ve never seen such ineptitude!”
The pastor said, “Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let’s have a word with him.” “Hi George! Say, what’s with that group ahead of us? They’re rather slow, aren’t they?”
The greens keeper replied, “Oh, yes, that’s a group of blind fire-fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.”
The group was silent for a moment.
The pastor said, “That’s so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.”
The doctor said, “Good idea. And I’m going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there’s anything he can do for them.”
The engineer said, “Why can’t these guys play at night?”
3) Heart Attack
A husband and wife were playing on the ninth green when she collapsed from a heart attack.
“Please dear, I need help.” she said.
The husband ran off saying, “I’ll go get some help.”
A little while later he returned, picked up his putter and began to line up his shot.
His wife, on the ground, raised up her head and said, “I may be dying and you’re putting?”
“Don’t worry dear. I found a doctor on the second hole who said he’d come and help you.”
“The second hole? When is he coming?”
“Hey! I told you not to worry.” he said, stroking his putt.
“Everyone has already agreed to let him play through.”
Dear Pops, the last one year’s been great with you being kept on your toes by all your kids and their kids too . It is hard to believe that you are a grand dad to SIX grandchildren (and you expect at least two more in addition 😀 ) . You’ve done your best to spoil our kids rotten and make life tough for us (teaching the twins to throw tomatoes around the house wasn’t a very good idea dad 😦 ……) !! Baby M and Baby SA are lucky to have you around to pamper them to bits 🙂
I know my kids miss your presence….there is so much you can teach them (besides throwing tomatoes )….so much they can learn from you ! Its just a pity that we stay so far away that we barely get to meet once a year 😦 . Not enough for my kids….heck, its not enough for me!!
On your birthday, I can only pray that you continue to have the stamina that you have now, to run around your grandkids, play with them, teach them naughty tricks and make life miserable for us.
You are in your element around them and a pleasure to watch. I pray you have many more such years ahead…….because the “grand-dad” role suits to to a T. Or is that “Tee” 😀 ?!!
Happy Birthday Dad 🙂
Edited to Add :-
This post had privacy setting on it before I hit publish…and all this while I was wondering why you haven’t commented on it yet 😦
Hope you can read it now…although its late by a few days 😦