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Archive for June 18th, 2013

Twinspeak

The twins, I regret to say, are no longer the wee innocents I took them to be. I think they crossed over to the smart-ass category right after they started school. For sure, in the last two years I have seen dramatic changes in the way they talk and express themselves. No longer do they simper or coo. Nopes. Its all over. The current trend is to yell, holler, scream, taunt, question, or just plain ignore. I believe it is the latest communication style in pre-schooler world. Or maybe, its just my two 😐

Anyhow, since they have a mouth, they will speak. Opinions have to be expressed. Questions have to be thrown at us, repeatedly. Disagreements have to be made loud and clear. Some recent conversations went like this :-

Lui is after me to open a small pack of Kelloggs Chocos.

Lui : (Simpering up to me) Mumma, please open this. Khul nahin raha. Please open it sweetie-pie.

I take the packet from her and rip it open.

Me : See pumpkin, thats how you tear it open. Else use a scissor.

Lui : (Haughtily)Haan, haan. Mujhe sab pata hai. Don’t teach me!

Me : 😐

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I’m at a wedding dinner with the MIL and kids. We are seated at a round table which has 8 other people around it. I try my best to make the kids interested in the dinner, but they refuse to eat anything other than the rumali roti. I give up and dig into my plate, most of which had already cooled down considerably. Since most of us at the table didn’t really know each other, conversations were muted. You can say we were the most silent table in the hall. Midway through my meal, breaking the silence, chirps a voice full of derision.

Shobby : Mumma, zyada mat khao. Nahin to aap pehle se bhi zyada fat ho jaoge. Mai aapke achche ke liye bol raha hoon.

I choked on my food, fervently praying that no one else heard it. But the faint titter that eventually broke into a full-fledged guffaw by all the others around the table, indicated otherwise 😦 .

Needless to say, I didn’t touch the biryani thereafter 😐

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We were coming back from the wedding in an auto. The MIL was mildly rebuking Shobby for his gaffe. The tyke, instead of being repentant, was petulant and kept claiming that he did nothing wrong. I couldn’t help giggling at his attempts to contradict the MIL. Finally, when he couldn’t take the rants anymore, he blurts out ,” Arre, ab bas karo!!! Nahin toh main aapki shikayat dada ke paas karoonga“.

Hearing this, Lui chips in with her pearls of wisdom.

Lui : Arre Shobby, koi fayada nahin. Jo log shaadi karte hai, woh log ek doosre ki complain nahin karte. Sirf tareef karte hain.

Shobby contemplated this wisdom seriously and did shut up after that 😐 !!

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One day, I got something in my eye and was looking for the culprit in front of the mirror. I was rather engrossed, not to mention I was standing rather close to the mirror. Shobby entered the room and seeing me in that pose arched an eyebrow, ” Mumma, kya hua? Face par dark-spots dhoondh rahe ho kya?”

Okay! Looks like TV time needs to be cut down further 😐 !!

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The BF had bought a few gorgeous frocks for Lui in his last visit. One day, Lui was trying them out and I mentioned that she looked like a fairy. Obviously, she was pleased at the compliment and preened in front of the mirror. Suddenly, something came over her and she came to me to return the compliment.

Lui : Mumma, dont feel bad. Aap yeh frock pehnoge toh aap bhi fairy jaise dikhoge. (Pause). Actually, bahut fat fairy nahin, sirf thode se fat. (Pause). (Spreading her arms wide) Aap itne fat nahin dikhoge, (bringing her hands a tad closer) sirf itne fat dikhoge. I’ll tell Abu to buy new, big frock for you.

Yeah right! Exactly what I need after that battering to my self-esteem 😦

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One day, I bought some new clothes for the kids. They were pretty overjoyed, rather, I should use the word overwhelmed, because frankly, very rarely are the two left speechless. After a few seconds of mute admiration for the new clothes, Lui turned to me and said, “Mumma, aap duniya ki sabse achchi mumma ho. Maine aapke jaise mummykahin nahin dekhi”. At this, Shobby chips in with input, ” Lui, Mumma itne achche issliye hain, because hum dono zyada, zyaada, zyaaaada achche bachhe hain“.

Right 😛

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Well, here are the two imps, full of sibling love 🙂

Sharing an umbrella

Sharing an umbrella

Hum dono

Hum dono

 

 

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