The BF left for Pune yesterday. I accompanied him to the airport, something that made him happy because no one in the US had ever come to drop him off at the airport before :) (the little things that make one happy ) . It was a long train ride to the airport but the best part is that the train stopped right in the belly of the airport. A couple of escalators and a transit train ride later, he could check-in for his flight. The airport was so well laid out and organized that I quite forgot what I had come there for.
Once the BF went in for security check, I said a small prayer for him and made my way back. It was another long journey back home. This time, I felt worse than what I had ever felt before. When we were in Pune and the BF left for Chicago, I would miss him terribly. But the security of family and daily chores/office was enough to keep the mind busy and occupied. When I got back home here , it stuck me that I was in a new place, all alone with two little kids. I knew enough about the city to get along fine. I know I will not have any trouble, specially now that I have made friends with a Indian lady two floors below and also with the wives of a couple of the BF’s colleagues. All of them were sweet to call me after the BF left, offering support and help in case I needed it. It was the only warm feeling in the otherwise cold emptiness of my heart. I worried for the kids, who were rather upset that they would not get to see their father for the next ten days. But like the burst of sunshine that only children can provide, they cheered me up today, excitedly counting down the days, telling me not to worry because they will behave and not trouble me (Alhamdulillah).
It is nearly 2am local time and I cannot sleep. I’ve been listening to some dopey songs, wallowing in misery because I miss him terribly and for once, I think I know what he must have gone through for the last one year. Every time he called up to say he dreaded the weekends, I would chide him and tell him to get a life and go out and find things to do. In his absence, I can’t think of a single thing that I want to do, even though I need to think up something quick or the kids will cry out of sheer boredom (we disconnected the cable here…..the rates were exorbitant for the one hour of cartoons that the kids watch. We show it to them on the laptop now. Netflix can wait). I thought of taking them out for a walk in the evening, but it got cold and windy so I dropped the plan.
The kids are deep asleep and I’m left blogging and humming the sad songs. Frankly, there is no rhyme or reason to this post. I’m sorry you read till here and got – nothing! In my apology, please accept this lovely song from “Pyaar ke side effects”. Feeling blue…yup! That sums up what I’m feeling right now!