“Being alone and liking it is, for a woman, an act of treachery, an infidelity far more threatening than adultery.” ~ Molly Haskell
And why is it a threat?
Because we end up spending time for ourselves. To do what we want to do and not what someone else wants us to do. But mostly, because it is a time with self, without pretences, without make-up, without the obnoxious cloud of someone else’s opinion.
There was a time I used to live alone, all by myself. Eat,cook,pray,work. And do everything else that I wanted, be it applying mehendi late into the night, watching horror films on the computer or just reading “The Fountainhead” for the thousandth time without anyone to question me when I would finally understand it!
Post marriage and kids, I’ve been having difficulty finding the me-time again. Sometimes, I just don’t want to be alone, I crave the attention of my babies, long for the warm hug from the BF, yearn to make new dishes for the family……. and then, one fine day, out of the blue, I feel a wild restlessness to be away from all of it. Away from the kids, the hubby, the family and work. To be somewhere far away all by myself……maybe even under a tree on a hillock with a book in my hand and a thermos of coffee to give me company. Sigh.
Do you ever feel that?
I felt this restlessness once again since the last few months. But given the tight schedule at work and home, I could not make time. I planned to take the BF out for lunch/dinner, but either he wasn’t available or the maids didn’t turn up and my plans went kaput. I almost gave up hope. But then, this morning, something changed. Or maybe, I changed.
A long time back, BFS was working in Bombay. She was away from us all and most of her weekends were either spent at work or just idling at the malls. Her colleagues from work could not spend every weekend watching movies with her, so one fine day, she showed her friends the finger (not really) and walked into a theatre all by herself. We gasped in shock and awe when she told us this. Because one usually never steps into a movie theatre alone! If you are a girl, I mean!
Coming back to topic, this morning, while I was going towards office (I told ya I was neck-deep in work!), I passed by a multiplex. I have no idea what snapped in my head.
The next thing I know is that I screeched to a halt, did a U-turn, turned up at the ticket booth , bought 1 ticket for the first available movie within the next 15 minutes (It was Harry Potter and the deathly hallows) and walked in. Only when I was standing outside the door of the screen did I realize the recklessness of my action. But I must say, I also felt a little twinge of thrill in my tummy 🙂 . I fished out my phone, called up BFS and told her what I was up to. BFS, in her true BFF way, congratulated me and boosted my morale a lot more. I promised to call her once the movie was over and then walked in with my head held high.
I know I got a LOT of curious looks when I walked in alone. But I wasn’t bothered. I was out to spend some time with myself, enjoying a movie and no one was going to spoil it for me. Correction, I wasn’t going to let anyone spoil it for me.
The movie was great!! And I’m glad they split the last part into two movies. This way, they could capture all the action without missing out on any part. The movie was shot mostly outdoors, there was no Hogwarts, and the pall of gloom was quite spooky. For once, a movie stayed true to the book and I’m grateful to the director for making this part of Harry Potter so intense. There is a cute scene where Harry pulls up Hermione for a dance, to cheer her up, and you can see that he has two left feet. It was rather cute. And oh yeah, the beginning part too, where there are seven Harry’s . That scene was VERY funny 🙂
Once it got over and the lights came on, I immediately called BFS.
“I. DID. IT”, I screamed. BFS was SO proud of me 🙂
Seriously, I was so mighty tickled by myself …..I guess I need to do something unpredictable like this once again.
I’m on a high right now 🙂
On that note, have a great weekend folks…..and yeah, it doesn’t hurt to spend time for yourself. Even if you are a woman. In fact, specially, if you are a woman.
Cheers to that 🙂 *clink*
Mothering Multiples......... 